Where's the Love?

In last week's post, 'Hope, Love & Tea', Joe Vitale and Dr. Hew Len talk about a powerful process that can change, heal and help us move on. The practice of Ho'oponopono cuts through to the deepest parts of us revealing what needs to change so we're able to reflect more light outward. Light, as it's used here, is a construct of love that's not so easy to grasp with our human minds. Our hearts feel only a fraction of its power but as we do the cleaning and clearing work, the light of unconditional love is able to shine a little brighter through us, always for the greater good, for the world, for the earth and everything in it. I'm not talking here about the fluffy, feel good stuff either. Love is a power I don't think we comprehend fully.

Cleaning is a process of examining our feelings and identifying where we're stuck or blocked. We can most often tell we're stuck or blocked because we experience the results or the problems associated with that blockage. For example, something triggers a reaction in us that's out of proportion with the situation, like the time someone cut into a lineup and I obsessed the rest of the day on how rude and crude the guy was. I caused the situation believing I needed to stand up to the impudent lineup crasher on behalf of everyone in the lineup. No-one else even noticed. I think they were all absorbed in their cell phones, but I was incensed! After calming down and introspection, I found a pattern that traced back to others trampling on my boundaries and my inability to stand up for myself.

The clearing part is releasing the blockages allowing them to resolve. We don't always need to know what's stuck and why either. Sometimes the intention of releasing is all we need. In the above example, I released painful feelings of abandonment. As a young empath, boundaries were crossed constantly. I felt every emotion around me deeply, especially the strong ones so no-one else could stand up for me because no-one knew how I felt. I know how to deal with other's feelings now but my inner child was still wounded. Caring for that wound may take the form of listening, understanding, healing, or changing an old belief to an empowered one. In my book, I describe what happened the next time I encountered a situation involving lineups. My reaction was surprising and confirmed where I'd changed and healed, but I'll get to that.

It took me awhile to understand why I needed to forgive myself in circumstances where I thought I'd played no part in what was unfolding around me. Again, in the above example, I forgave myself for being completely insensitive to the young man behind me. Where was the love or light I purported to have in this situation? It was instantly triggered into painful feelings and a victim mentality. I couldn't get that it was my responsibility to do the work so that whatever was in my life was in my life to clean and clear. Understanding that reality took me out of being a victim and into being part of the solution. If it's present in my life, then it's up to me to deal with it starting with myself. Ho'oponopono is a powerful solution: I'm sorry. Please forgive me. I love you. Thank you.

Curiously, I encountered another scenario at the same coffee shop shortly after that. A man spoke to me. “It's sure busy in here.” he said, “Are you looking for the lineup?” I replied, “Good thing I pre-ordered. I’m just picking it up.” The man smiled and said, “That’s the way to do it.” His kind words were a gift spoken with care and I was able to receive it with grace and thanks from a man who modeled a loving, uplifting response to lineups.

That's exactly what happens when the light clears the dark parts of us. They're transformed and inevitably, I've noticed, there'll be something that happens to confirm the change in us.

Isn't it amazing that I was free from the pain that was inside me and another person WAS present, front, and center, in my life, to receive and confirm how I'd changed. Where's the love? The light that shone brightly enough in me to change and heal also shone outward that day in an uplifting encounter between two people at the coffee shop. Connection, that's where love is.